“Oh, things will be different someday,” but it’s right now and it’s fucking hell

Things just never seem to suffice for me. I have so much resentment bottled up inside me; I hate feeling this, it literally makes me sick to my stomach. I want to feel wanted again, loved. But how much can a girl do?

Ughhgh fuck this, I’m gonna go watch Titantic and cuddle in bed with my sweets, Maggiepoo. Fucking A+ film

I’m not the same girl anymore.
I’m thinking now, with the new year it’s time to focus on ME. A new start of no more going straight back to you, no more lazy,lonely, and pitiful nights, and no more binge eating.
I want to get my life back on track..

I don’t need people bringing me down.
I don’t need you assuming I’ll come crawling back with the snap of your fingers.
I don’t need failing grades because I’m a lazy little fuck
It’s time I focus on things that are important to me and not worrying about the little things or getting caught up in the bullshit.
I’m done asking myself, “how could someone who told me they loved me and were there through everything, just completely destroy the relationship we had?”
I’m done asking myself, “what could have been?”
I’m done telling myself, “None of this will matter soon”. Because this is right now and I’m not letting myself live in the future or nonexistant.
I’m done having those highs that just lead to my most ultimate lows.
And I am done waiting for my parents to finalize their divorce.
To be honest, I don’t give a fuck anymore.
I’m doing me this year.